God called it pride. Pride that my wants were more important than Him. Plain and simple. I wanted things to go my way, for me to have control. I was focusing all of me to my wants. And that, my friend, is pride (with idol worship thrown in).
Humility is content with enough. Seeking more than enough is pride lying:
1. You deserve it after what you’re dealing with (sick, no sleep).
2. Just this once won’t matter.
3. This is easier than what you planned – you really don’t want to change – you’re fine.
There may be more lies, but these three stuck out.
1. Do I really want what I deserve? God’s holy and just wrath? No, I am thankful for His mercy, grace and redeeming blood.
2. Every compromise matters in my life. The Bible is full of stories about people who compromised and the last effects: Adam and Eve, Abram, Sarai and Hagar, Judah and Tamar, David and Bathsheba, ect. Their stories focus on the sin, yet look a few verses before the sin and you’ll see the compromise: Eve doubting God’s good for her, Sarai impatient for God’s promise, Judah fearful of losing another son married to Tamar, David staying home instead of going to war.
3. I am not fine. I am being made holy. In that I need to do things in partnership with God and His Holy power.
Yes, it may seem easier to take the route of compromise, however, life gets harder the further I move away from God’s will. Life gets easier the closer I get to God. When I delight in God, I get what I long for. I have proper perspective on the things of my life, of this world. God placed this verse before me:
Delight yourself also in the Lord and He will give you the desires and secrets petitions of your heart. Psalm 37:4
Pride is a root sin. I can see I will always have issues, yet God is faithful and I trust Him and His grace to grow me out of this sin.