I had to write about my crazy day yesterday. I did well with eating. I'm still 95% meat free. It's hard to go completely vegetarian when your family meal has meat in it. I usually pick out the big chunks. I'm just not that devoted to the idea to be all loopy about it.
So back to yesterday and the undo guilt I felt. I wanted some dark chocolate. Now, I used to not like dark chocolate and since giving up sweets I love it. Its not that I need chocolate, however it is something delicious God gave and I want to enjoy. I usually eat less than 1/3 of a serving which is an under 100 calorie treat. I don't eat it everyday either. Yesterday I did. There wasn't any guilt at this point.
Then for dinner, I wanted a glass of wine. There's something about Italian and wine that go together. When I have wine I fill half my glass with ice and water and top with wine, so I really only drink about 2 oz. per glass.
That's when guilt started to creep in and I hadn't even poured the drink. Then I thought about the chocolate and the few Sun Chips I had as a snack. I said to myself, this is crazy. Why should I feel guilty over the foods I've eaten? What's wrong with a glass of wine?
I didn't drink the wine and still wondered why the guilt? Why was my conscience against it?
As we prepared for bed God breezed the answer. It isn't wrong. None of it was wrong. However, I asked Him to help me stay on track. I asked Him to help me reach my goals. Then I questioned what was going on when He answers that prayer, when He sends me that grace I requested. Crazy right?
How often have I done that? Have I asked God to do something then stubbornly refuse the help and then blame Him for how I feel? I'm successfully humbled and thank God for giving grace on this as well. God is Good!